Monday, August 19, 2013

Just like a yo-yo!

No, I'm not referring to the Osmond's hit song in the 70's.  But, just like a yo-yo, here I go again on the proverbial yo-yo cycle to loose these creepy pounds that I've put on in the last 2 years whilst trying to avoid my chronological age  Let's get wound up!

Aging: The Snake

As I have posted, and will post again, on "Vain Worries," I have struggled with the idea of turning 50.  I felt my life was over.  I laid down and wouldn't get up, until I laid down and couldn't get up.  Yep, several months ago, I was in the floor, and couldn't get up without help.  I had slipped on ice, fell, and hurt myself; nevertheless, I couldn't get up.  I felt like I was in a "Life Alert" commercial.  My  4-year old niece had me mummified in ACE bandages on that wet kitchen floor by the time her mother came home from work.

On Saturday, I went to the mall with my sister, and her daughter.  The mall had a petting zoo coupled with a children's service provider fair.  It was sponsored by Momtopia, the group that provides monthly entertainment for children who aren't in preschool, or day care.

There was a petting zoo where an Albino Burmese Python was available to handle.  Well, my bucket list has a few things on it, and a few scratched off: I added handling the snake at the last minute.  I felt like Brittany Spears in Concert.  This glorious silky snake draped around my neck: me smiling with my toothless grin. (We'll get to why I'm missing teeth in another post.) Oh, did I mention I don't like snakes? I was a bit shaky, but bravely enjoyed the 3.5 seconds it was wriggling up my back.

The snake handler snapped my picture, and when I looked at it I thought, "who is that wretched woman holding that snake?"  I was unrecognizable to myself.  The once beautiful woman I saw every morning had transformed into a hideous, fat, unkempt, old lady in need of hair color.  Although, while younger, I didn't think myself beautiful.  Sadly, I look back and think what bullying, and low self-esteem cause you to miss.  (But, that's another story too.)

Aging will sneak up on you like a snake, wriggling on your back, and attack! You wake up one morning wondering where youth went.

52, the new 32?!

My favorite age was 32.  I was a single working woman with two children, happy in her career.  The clothes on the racks in stores were elegant, well fitted, and affordable.  My skin was still aglow, and Clinique got a big chunk of my salary.  I may not be able to look 32 again, but at 52, can make myself feel that way again.  But, it takes determination, a plan, work, and follow through.  Change can't happen with out those objectives.

Barbara Stanwick's character in the "Thorn Birds" makes a dramatic statement whilst trying to woo Cardinal DeBricashaw.  Basically, she said her youthful self was trapped in an aged body, but she still "feels, needs, and loves."  Yes!  That is exactly the way I feel.  Aging is a constant: how we handle aging is the variable.

I hate that "crying" feeling

Yesterday while taking my Sunday afternoon rest, I accidentally started my old iTunes playlist I made several years ago before my hearing got worse.  I'm also a late deafened adult who is also trying to reconcile her hearing loss and the impact it has made on her life.

The song"Turn the Beat Around" featuring Gloria Estevan came on; it was my high stepping (marching in place) song during the 90's.  So, I jumped up, and for 3.5 minutes did a cardiovascular workout.  It felt good!  I did that several times yesterday; although, the songs sound vastly different because of my change in, and loss of hearing.

My niece saw me doing it, and decided she wanted in on the action. And, we agreed to exercise together every day.  I showed her my even older exercise music, Disco Mickey Mouse on DVD, on Ebay.  I'm going to have to order it for us. That made her even more excited.

Back to crying.  Last night after I went to bed, I was thinking about my ragged, aging body, and began to weep at how different it feels, how tired it gets, and how droopy it looks.  When I asked if he saw my snake picture, my son even confirmed my assessment by remarking, "You really need to loose weight."  He has lost 30 pounds plus.

Sobbing to my beloved, my husband, in his loving, jovial tone said, "It doesn't do any good to cry, because it can't change anything.  Being old beats the alternative!"  He meant dead.  I did feel better.  He has that ability to uplift.  I realized only I have the ability to change anything.  And, I woke up at 52 and a half years old from my "turning 50" haze.

I've wasted two and a half years of my life worrying about something I can't change.  It bothers me to see the microwave or my little Hay Day game count down the seconds.  Those are seconds never to return.  And, as a Christian, I fell back on my "go to" verse, "Only one life will soon be passed: only what's done for Christ will last."  Wow, I've got a lot of making up to do.

My Fitness Pal

"My Fitness Pal" is an application that can be downloaded on your iPhone. There is a database where one can scan the bar code on a food product, and it brings up the nutritional information.  Also, the ability to manually enter food is available should the bar scan not recognize the product, which is rare.

A profile can be built and MFP will tell you how many calories you can take in.  It calculates diet, and exercise, and even has the ability to let you interface with other users by friending them.  I have used it half-heartedly in the past, but today, once again, my passion for loosing weight "this time" has begun.

When I opened it up this morning, my only friend had posted, "praying for strength today."  I replied, "so am I."

The End

We never know when our time is up be it 12, 22, 32, 42, 52, or 102.  But, how we use our time is what is important.  Do you speak kind words, are you patient, trustworthy, truthful, conscientious, timely, abiding...  Those qualities are important ways treat those around us.  It makes for a happy person.  But, treating yourself the way you treat others is just as important as treating others the way you treat yourself.

Manage your mind, body, and spirit by eating healthy, exercising, investing in yourself at whatever your age.  As you age, do it with grace and charm.  Yes, that sounds cliche'.  I thought so too, but it is the truth.  Have a great day!

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